I’m sure I’ve broached this subject before but seeing as how I write about it on a regular basis, I enjoy discussing it. I’ve mentioned before how I have a hard time believing in love at first sight. It’s not that I think it never happens, I just don’t understand how you can fall in love with someone you don’t know. Sure, we can find someone attractive at first sight but wanting to lick whipped cream off their naked body is not the same as true love. 🙂
I don’t know if I’ve mentioned my repeated annoyance with stories or movies where the main characters lock gazes across a crowded room and fall deeply, madly, unequivocally in love. What follows is often an adventure of passion and/or mayhem. Sometimes it’s a good story, sometimes it’s great. Always, always though, I get so bored with the automatic love that springs up between the male and female leads.
It’s not that I can’t see the romance in something like that happening. It’s very sweet sometimes, if somewhat unrealistic. In my opinion, real, lasting love comes from getting to know someone and loving all their foibles and quirks. Somewhere in the middle of that happening, you end up wanting them so badly, you’d step over your own grandmother’s body to get them in bed. Well, OK, that might be an extreme analogy. But I think you get my meaning.
It makes me wonder sometimes, what is it that makes us fall in love? If you say how a person looks, well, that’s true to a certain extent. I mean, you do have to find the other person attractive but there’s that old saying: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You fall in love with someone’s heart and soul and no amount of physical alteration should change that simple fact. I may not believe in love at first sight, but I’m still a romantic at heart. 🙂 Ssh….don’t tell anyone!
Anyway, back to my question: what makes us fall in love? In my stories, I don’t even think I could pinpoint the reasons why they love each other. So often, the women are such opposites from the men in my stories. There was the single mother, the shy nurse, the romance author. 😉 And all of them dated professional athletes. Obviously. 😛 I wrote these stories, they all fell in love with each other, and I don’t know why. Strange? Sure.
I suppose they fell in love in different ways. Because they were friends first, perhaps. Maybe because they could make each other laugh like no one else. Maybe they fell in love because they became friends and realized after how much they wanted to be with each other and no one else.
The other angle with the whole falling in love thing is knowing when it’s love. Again, there’s a difference between simple wanting to rub against someone, and wanting to spend your life with them. So how do you know you’re feeling the real thing? This is something else that I can’t pinpoint in my stories. When asked, most people would probably be unable to name a single event or moment that made them realize they were in it for life. So how do you know? Do you just wake up and you know? Does someone say to you, ‘Hey, you look like you’re in love?’ 😉
If you’ve read my work, would you be able to pinpoint any of these things? Why they fell in love? When they knew it? I still don’t know and I’ve been rereading a few of them! What about in your real life? How did you know you’d found The One?
OK. That’s about all I’m going to write about now. The CFL playoffs have started – that’s Canadian football, for those of you who don’t know – and my family is slightly engrossed, to put it mildly. 😉 I’m too distracted to write more now.
So take care and happy reading!