So This is Love…

I’m sure I’ve broached this subject before but seeing as how I write about it on a regular basis, I enjoy discussing it. I’ve mentioned before how I have a hard time believing in love at first sight. It’s not that I think it never happens, I just don’t understand how you can fall in love with someone you don’t know. Sure, we can find someone attractive at first sight but wanting to lick whipped cream off their naked body is not the same as true love. 🙂

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned my repeated annoyance with stories or movies where the main characters lock gazes across a crowded room and fall deeply, madly, unequivocally in love. What follows is often an adventure of passion and/or mayhem. Sometimes it’s a good story, sometimes it’s great. Always, always though, I get so bored with the automatic love that springs up between the male and female leads.

It’s not that I can’t see the romance in something like that happening. It’s very sweet sometimes, if somewhat unrealistic. In my opinion, real, lasting love comes from getting to know someone and loving all their foibles and quirks. Somewhere in the middle of that happening, you end up wanting them so badly, you’d step over your own grandmother’s body to get them in bed. Well, OK, that might be an extreme analogy. But I think you get my meaning.

It makes me wonder sometimes, what is it that makes us fall in love? If you say how a person looks, well, that’s true to a certain extent. I mean, you do have to find the other person attractive but there’s that old saying: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You fall in love with someone’s heart and soul and no amount of physical alteration should change that simple fact. I may not believe in love at first sight, but I’m still a romantic at heart. 🙂 Ssh….don’t tell anyone!

Anyway, back to my question: what makes us fall in love? In my stories, I don’t even think I could pinpoint the reasons why they love each other. So often, the women are such opposites from the men in my stories. There was the single mother, the shy nurse, the romance author. 😉 And all of them dated professional athletes. Obviously. 😛 I wrote these stories, they all fell in love with each other, and I don’t know why. Strange? Sure.

I suppose they fell in love in different ways. Because they were friends first, perhaps. Maybe because they could make each other laugh like no one else. Maybe they fell in love because they became friends and realized after how much they wanted to be with each other and no one else.

The other angle with the whole falling in love thing is knowing when it’s love. Again, there’s a difference between simple wanting to rub against someone, and wanting to spend your life with them. So how do you know you’re feeling the real thing? This is something else that I can’t pinpoint in my stories. When asked, most people would probably be unable to name a single event or moment that made them realize they were in it for life. So how do you know? Do you just wake up and you know? Does someone say to you, ‘Hey, you look like you’re in love?’ 😉

If you’ve read my work, would you be able to pinpoint any of these things? Why they fell in love? When they knew it? I still don’t know and I’ve been rereading a few of them! What about in your real life? How did you know you’d found The One?

OK. That’s about all I’m going to write about now. The CFL playoffs have started – that’s Canadian football, for those of you who don’t know – and my family is slightly engrossed, to put it mildly. 😉 I’m too distracted to write more now.

So take care and happy reading!



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2 responses to “So This is Love…

  1. Tom Stovall

    One of the things I like about most of your stories is you let the relationship develope before they have sex. I can’t relate to many of your characters because my wife was the first girl I ask for a date ( She gave me and excuse so I ask another girl and ran into my future wife that night on a date with another of my classmates), She acceped me when I ask for a date the next day and we were married 51 year when she passed away last year.

    I don’t really care for the sex but I enjoy the romance in my favorite stories since I know it is very unlikely I will have it in my life again.

    Please kep writing some of these type of stories

  2. Lady Falcon

    I feel a challenge coming….lol, now I’m gonna have to re-read your stories for the fifth time and try to spot when they fall in love! Maybe…as I typed that I got to thinking…for the stories that involve teammates or the consecutive stories…it might be a matter of seeing how being in a stable relationship effected their teammate that got them in the right frame of mind to fall in love or at least got them looking? Like with Mark G., so many of his teammates had already fallen I think he was ready to fall too. Then again, I don’t think any of them actively fought falling in love. There was Hillary? Who was down on hockey players so that took some time to get her mind around to believing a hockey player could be faithful and trusting her own feelings after she was hurt.

    How do you know its love? It’s a subjective thing…meaning its different for everyone. However, to start with you might ask yourself these questions…
    1. Do you get enjoyment out of doing something for them?
    2. Do you expect to get something from them after you’ve given them something?
    3. Do you feel good or happy just being in their presence?
    4. Do you think about them even when they aren’t around or haven’t just called, texted, or emailed you?

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